Oh southern Indiana, you gotta love it. Last night we got about 3" of snow which translated to early morning phone calls from superintendent's letting us know that school would be cancelled for today. The Cleveland girl inside of me balks at the ridiculousness of cancelling school when you can clearly see the road that you are driving on, but the Hoosier girl inside me knows that southern Indiana is ill-prepared to deal with any amount of snow because they are in serious denial about preparing for things that don't always happen here. The girls rejoiced and I cringed. I knew that I had a class to teach today at a university that was very unlikely to cancel classes. I knew that I basically only needed my girls to be watched for 50 minutes so I could talk to my students about sexual health.
Did I ask for help? Of course not. The optimist inside me won out when debating whether to call someone to watch the girls, so instead I opted to take the girls with me to my lecture and bring along some coloring books & toys to occupy them for the mere 50 minutes I had to work. I really thought they might sit in the corner and color. I really thought they might actually be good listeners for me. I really really was WRONG.
Here they are about to go outside and burn off some energy before my class:
I made them go outside and play in the snow twice before we left. I made sure they were fed lunch and had some just-in-case snacks along too. I packed a bag of toys and such to keep their attention. Little did I realize that 44 college students are much more entertaining than bags of toys.
I should have realized my little entertainers would succumb to the temptation to make the whole class laugh. What I couldn't have realized was what they would do once they got their first laugh.
This week in my health and wellness course we are covering sexual health. Thankfully today was not the sexual behaviors and STI lecture, rather the anatomy, physiology, and relationship lecture. My students were remarkably quiet for a Monday even. I put up a picture of the external female genitalia and none of them even wanted to say what it was. Annika, being the over-achiever that she is, promptly raised her hand and announced to the class, "It's a vagina. Duh!" The entire room erupted in 1/2 laughter and 1/2 gasps. Apparently it is both hilarious and appalling that my 6 year old knows the proper name to call her junk. Who knew?
Annika was hooked. She proceeded to spend the next 45 minutes dancing in front of the class, writing funny things on the chalkboard, and interrupting me to ask questions like, "Can I call on the next person when they all raise their hands?" Yes, Mayzie also interrupted me a couple of times, but mostly to ask me to help her with something like the sweet little 4 year old she is. Annika was a terror of holy proportions.
It was stressful. It was embarrassing. It was hilarious...though admittedly I am only laughing about it now hours later.
Lesson learned: Ask for help when you need it and NEVER count on your kids to behave when you need them to because that is the moment they will choose to prove you wrong every time.
Snow days were so much better when I was the one getting the day off!